PSYCHOTHERAPY
FOR MEN


In my private practice, I work with a diverse group of men facing challenges in their work and relationships; among my patients are artists, musicians, professionals in law, business, technology, and medicine, as well as people in the LGBT community. In addition, I have the following specialties:

  • Bipolar spectrum disorders

  • Drug and alcohol concerns

  • Psychological adaptation to significant medical illness

  • Fatherhood and related men’s issues

Depending upon the problem and the level of acuity, some patients may need to consider the addition of medication to their treatment regimen. I will gladly discuss this with you, and can provide referrals to several excellent psychiatrists with whom I work in shared treatment.

Therapeutic Approach

My theoretical views and practical understanding of psychotherapy reflects the complexity of the subject, and cannot be easily summarized. It is best just to call and your questions can be answered.

I believe people come to therapy with the intention to get better, and the willingness to do the courageous work of self-examination that this requires. I am honored to share that process with them.

I am present focused, action oriented, and a stickler for linguistic precision. Words matter, because when you talk, your brain is listening. Binary language reflects binary thinking, which often leads to extremes in mood and behavior, typically avoidance. Avoidance produces a moment of relief. Relief has a special name in learning theory: Negative reinforcement. Negative reinforcement is rocket fuel for anxiety - which manifests as avoidance - either freezing or behavioral avoidance [e.g. avoiding conflict]. The solution is not easy but higfhly effective and gets easier with time. It is called opposite action. Know what you truly value, where you want to get to, will motivate you to find the courage to go towards and through the fear in order to reach the kind of life you truly desire. New behavor brings new experiences, new opportunites for learning, and it really does get easier over time.

It helps to have a philosophy of life which guides your actions through challenging times. As the Stoic philosophers would say: Ask yourself what sort of world do you want to live in? Then act like that. Be the change.

The world I want to live in in is curious, playful, honorable, with compassion, love, acceptance, and forgiveness, especially when these things are difficult. That is when you need it most, as does the world.

Zero judgement [so binary and distorted] yet with honest discernment. Not the good/bad evaluation of self and others, rather the “degrees of” helpful/unhelpful; skillful/unskillful, which are more dimensional. We canlearn to be more helpful, more skillful with ourselves and others.

At this point I have concluded that everyone is doing the best they can with what they have. Clearly, tThe best they can doesnt mean the best [just read the news] - its the best they can right now, with what they have right now.

At the end of the day, in this brief time we have here, you have to be on your side, learning to live a life of absolute compassion, not idiot compassion [you can look it up].

Finally, as my dear friend’s Rabbi said: The purpose of life is to be a good ancestor. As a parent or not, you are an ancestor to those that follow. Do your best to be a good one.